


The Prince and The Sacrifice

by keepquietplease



Series: Sanders Sides Stories [21]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Abuse, Abused Anxiety | Virgil Sanders, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Mermaid, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders has bad parents, Because Remus wants to feed Virgil, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders Being Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, I accidentally gave Virgil a praise kink, I'm Sorry, I'm afraid a seal dies in this, I'm basing mermaid anatomy on seahorses, I'm not proud either, I'm so fucking sorry, I'm still not writing fucking smut, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, It is my belief that Remus can and will pick up and carry Virgil around, Just dirty jokes and implied intimacy, M/M, No Smut, Sympathetic Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, VIRGIL IS A PRINCE, Virgil pukes, cursing, hoo boy, okay so listen, sex is mentioned though
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-23
Updated: 2020-08-23
Packaged: 2021-03-06 21:21:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,898
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26055634
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/keepquietplease/pseuds/keepquietplease
Summary: Virgil wasn't allowed to do much as the prince.  He wasn't allowed near the beach or outside in general.  He had a purpose even if he didn't know it.Then he met Remus, and everything became clear.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders
Series: Sanders Sides Stories [21]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1837975
Comments: 21
Kudos: 196





	The Prince and The Sacrifice

**Author's Note:**

  * For [The_gay_snake](https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_gay_snake/gifts).



> ....I think I accidentally gave Virgil a praise kink. I'm sorry y'all.  
> I had to make this one mature because I really tuned into Remus in this one.  
> I will delete this one day in the far future out of fear someone will find this account. Enjoy it while you can.

Virgil was never allowed near the beach. He wasn't allowed anywhere near it, despite the fact his room looked out to the sea. He wasn't quite sure why he was forbidden to go near the ocean, but he was always watched by guards. His parents told him it was because there were horrible monsters within the water. At a young age, he believed them, but as he got older, he became more annoyed. The rules kept increasing. He wasn't allowed to leave the palace. He wasn't allowed to explore. He wasn't allowed to do anything. He didn't like being royalty, and yeah, first world problems or whatever, but he hated it. He felt like he couldn't actually help anyone with his age. No one in the palace took him seriously. He overheard a couple guards discussing the fact he won't be in the castle for long. He went to his parents, confused, but they said it was nonsense. They fired those guards, and Virgil felt even worse when that happened. His father was quite unhappy that Virgil spoke out of turn and cost him a worker, and he received a severe beating. One that reminded him of his childhood if he ever did anything wrong. He had bruises that he saw for weeks after this one, and he never reported another guard again.

His breaking point was on his twentieth birthday. He was suppose to take over the court, but his parents made him aware of the fact they had another heir he didn't know about. Someone who had been able to leave the palace. Someone who had fought in wars to defend their land. He had a fucking brother this whole time, but no one bothered to let him know. He was never supposed to take over. He wasn't supposed to be the one who studied the palace life or researched how to successfully handle politics or go to meeting after meeting to learn how to run the kingdom. It was a huge shock for him. It was hurtful. He didn't know his purpose.

"Honey, you have purpose." Virgil's mother said, her lips pressed together is a disturbing smile that quite frankly scared Virgil. It reminded him of when she would execute someone for treason. Virgil gulped, looking at the ground in fear. "Virgil. Look up when we're speaking to you. You were made to follow orders. Make sure you do it properly by looking people in the eyes."

Virgil snapped his head up, making eye contact with her. "Yes ma'am."

"You have a purpose. It's more important than ruling this kingdom. You will provide us protection and solace for at least four hundred years. It happens every so often we need an extra heir for this job. You will protect us. You will make our people proud."

"Of c-course, ma'am. May I ask what my job will be--" Virgil stopped. His father held up a hand and snapped, making Virgil tremble.

"You will not ask questions." He said, smiling at bit at his son's fear. It was not a nice smile. It was one that was almost similar to his mother's, but there was much more glee. "You will not do anything but fulfill your purpose. We can always have another heir. You are disposable."

Virgil nodded, trying to compose himself. "Yes sir."

"Get out of my sight before I decide you’re disposable now."

Virgil hurried off, closing his room's door gently. He wasn't sure if his parents were being serious or if they'd change their minds, so he decided to do something. It was not a smart thing he was about to do, and he may be killed for it. Virgil opened his window, seeing the guards below. He would have to be sneaky for this. He gripped a stone against the wall, scaling down the castle. This was not the first time he did this, but the last time he did it, he was caught. He still has a limp in his right leg, and it hurt when he put too much pressure on that ankle. It never healed fully.

He made it down most of the way, finding a spot free of guards before proceeding to not realize that those bushes weren't bushes, but tree tops. He felt the lack of ground before he processed it all, and when he finally realized he was falling, he landed on his arm and heard a pop. He bit his lip hard, not trying to attract any attention to where he was. He writhed in the ground, too scared to actually look at his arm. He wouldn't be able to climb back up to his room. That was one thing he was completely aware of. He took a deep breath, trying to calm down. He was faintly aware the ground wasn't grass or dirt. He, carefully, without looking at his arms, used the arm he didn't land on to feel the ground. It slipped through his fingers. Sand. He was on sand. He stood up, feeling every part of his body beg him to stop moving. Telling him he couldn't keep moving. He was so close to the water. The ocean. He needed to feel it. Just once. He was in so much pain, especially his one arm, but he persisted. He collapsed in the shallow part of the water, the cool water feeling so great. He tried to move the one arm, but he couldn't. He tried to grab it, but that made him just cry out in pain, collapsing completely into the water in shock. He wasn't really sure if water was going into his mouth or tears. He couldn't move due to the pain he was in. He heard something in the water, but he couldn't bring himself to look up.

"Oh my. You look awful. What happened?"

Virgil stayed down, sniffing. Fuck. He was so dead. He was a dead man the minute whoever this was swimming so late figured out who he was. 

"Hey, kid, look up at me. Come on. Can't be as bad as you’re making it. Can you sit up?"

Virgil shook his head, trying to stop hyperventilating. This was awful. Why did he try to sneak out? "God, please don't tell my parents. Fuck. Please don't tell anyone I'm out here."

He felt hands on him, yelping when they touched the arm he couldn't move. He was sat up to look at a shirtless man who had very sharp teeth, seaweed in his messy, tangled hair, and black, cold eyes. Virgil felt himself panic more. Fuck! Fuck! That was the monster his parents told him about! He was dead. He was so fucking dead. The monster seemed to notice and shushed him. "Don't freak out. You're okay. I won't hurt you. Haven't hurt a human on purpose in years! Bad for our relations! We have a treaty going on with your king and queen, don't worry. Let me see your arm."

"W-what treaty?"

"Oh, you know, every couple of centuries they give us an unwanted child to feed our wanted children. The unwanted heir of the ocean is usually the one who battles the sacrifice so they don't lose the actual person who's going to rule the sea. I'm the unwanted prince, so it'll be my first ritual. We usually eat them, mostly by tearing their limbs off so they drown. Gotta make sure they can't swim away, not that they could. The unwanted heir from the human world isn't really allowed to be near the ocean since we don't want to grow attached like we do with most humans, so I doubt he can swim. We're trying to change our practices, though. I mean, it's been a couple thousand years by now. Maybe we shouldn't keep eating our sacrifices. This time we're going to try something different when we get our offering, but the whole kingdom gathers to watch, so you'll be able to see it live. No spoilers. Bad news now. Okay? Your arm is dislocated."

"Oh god. Oh fuck." Virgil didn't want to be eaten by a fucking monster. 

"It's only going to hurt a lot when I pop it in. We have to pop it in. It will be bad if we don't. I need you to focus on something other than your arm."

Virgil was focused on the fact he was going to be fed to a fucking fish man. "No, I got that covered. What age is the prince when he gets sold off to you-FUCK!" 

Virgil felt so much pain out of nowhere as he felt his arm get straightened and heard an equally grotesque pop as before. He felt more tears pool in his eyes, and he retched a bit and leaned on the monster's shoulder. 

"Oh god. Oh god that hurt. Fuck. Fuck. I'm in so much pain."

"Usually when they're twenty one. That's when we get a free human to have for our own desires. You should know this. Do they not tell you?"

"No! Apparently they don't tell the fucking unwanted prince shit! They just fucking tell him not to go to the ocean because something will eat him! Not because they're concerned, but apparently because I can't be eaten until it's time to sacrifice me!"

"Oooohh, wow, this is awkward. I'm sorry."

"Oh my god!"

"I mean, we tell our unwanted heirs they're being forced to participate in the ritual for peace or whatever."

"I'm going to throw up. I don't want to die. I'm so fucking confused and scared and everything hurts."

"This can't be a pleasant feeling for you. If you puke, I won't judge. We're kind of going to be getting to know each other very soon, so I'll get used to it. Let it out. Actually, you know what'll make you feel better? A snack. Let me get you a quick snack. Stay here."

Virgil watched his future killer dive into the water. His tail was a beautiful shimmering mixture of black and green that made Virgil feel slightly calmer for some reason, but he was still panicking like crazy. He was soaked, he had sand all over his clothes. and he was not climbing up the castle again. He had a year until he was twenty one. He was going to die so soon. Maybe if he ran away. Yeah, okay, he could run away. His whole body was in pain, and salt water surprisingly hurt the cuts on his body from the fall, but he could muster up the strength to run away. Soon, the monster came back up with a dead seal, smiling.

"Okay, so I got you food."

"Oh my god. What the fuck. Did you kill that?"

"I did! For you! See? Here's the part of the neck I ripped out," he pointed at a huge wound. "I did a good job! It tastes good! I promise! There's a lot of fat on these, but I think that makes them tastier."

Virgil stood up, moving away before vomiting on the beach. Fuck. That was so gross and upsetting. This was awful.

"I'm sorry. Oh! You don't like seal! I am so sorry! I can kill a shark or some fish for you?"

"No! No, no. No killing things for me. You're going to kill me in a year, so I'd rather you not have more practice. You can rip out my throat just fine now."

"We're changing the ritual. I'm not going to kill you. I'm simply going to marry you and turn you into someone who can breathe under water. Is that better at all?"

Virgil nodded, shaking. "Slightly better, yeah."

"I'm Remus. What's your name?"

"Virgil. I'm Virgil."

* * *

Virgil snuck out each night, getting smarter about not falling and dislocating his shoulder all the time. He kept going for two reasons. One, if Remus was lying about changing the ritual, he could at least make Remus grow attached to him. The second was because anything beat getting disciplined at the castle. He got to the beach this time with a bloody lip and black eye. He sat on a rock near the water, waiting for Remus. Six months until his birthday. He saw Remus in the distance, swimming towards him. He waved, receiving one back. Remus dove under the water and popped up in front of Virgil five minutes later.

"Hi Virgil! How are you today?" Remus smiled until he saw his face. It quickly turned into a frown of worry before it melded into something close to anger. "What happened to you? Did you fall again?"

"No. I, uh, I spoke out of turn today. My parents weren't happy. This is actually the least damage they've done. I'm fine." Virgil covered his lip with his arm, shaking his head. "It's fine."

"They hit you?!"

"They discipline me."

"That's not--oh, Patton is going to fucking lose it. I can't believe humans! Yeah, we sacrifice the unwanted heir in battle too, but we at least treat them like valued members of our society! Let me see your face." Remus gently moved his arm away, inspecting the bruises and cuts. "Oh, my poor human. My poor dear. Let me clean your face."

Virgil winced as Remus wiped his face with the salt water. Remus paused, making sure Virgil was alright before continuing to clean.

"I'm sorry. I know it hurts. It's okay. I promise it's almost over, and when we're done, we'll practice swimming again. I noticed your one leg can't kick much, so--wait a fucking minute, was that them too?!"

Virgil nodded, leaning against Remus' hand. This was the only time he felt a caring touch from anyone. He wanted more of it.

"I'm going to kill them. I'm going to kill your parents. They shouldn't be allowed to do this. Okay. Okay, so your one leg doesn't--fuck! I'm so fucking mad! Okay, it isn't as strong as the other, so we're going to focus on that leg. We need to make sure you can swim evenly--no, I'm still mad. I'm fucking telling everyone about this. Even when we got sacrifices that we ate, you don't abuse them! That can cause scar tissue, and that's not fun to eat. This is cruel to you, and it is an offense to us. It's even more of an offense now because I'm marrying you! You're my fiancé! How dare they?! I actually give a shit about you!"

"Kiss me?"

"What?"

"I said, um, uh--" Virgil babbled, eyes wide before he blinked. "Wait, why am I embarrassed? You're marrying me. Kiss me."

Remus grinned, leaning close and kissing him. He began to mumble praises against his lips, telling Virgil how beautiful and wonderful he was. Virgil melted into the kiss, flustered at the constant praise. It was so wonderful. It was odd and confusing, but it was wonderful. He slipped into the water, wrapping his legs around Remus' tail to stay balanced. He felt the bottom flick slightly before relaxing. Remus pulled away, kissing his cheek down to his neck. "Oh, you are wonderful. You are perfect."

"Remus," 

"I can't wait for you to have my children."

"Mm, I can't have children. I don't have the proper parts."

"Oh, you will when we alter your body."

"Wait, what?"

* * *

Virgil was a quick learner. He could swim decently for someone who only just learned and often got distracted by Remus during practice. It usually ended with them making out either in the water or on the edge of the shore. It was always at nighttime. Virgil was much better at sneaking in and out of the castle without any consequences. They had a month before his birthday. A month before he would be transformed and given away. Virgil began to have no qualms about the ritual. He believed what Remus told him. Maybe it's the fact he felt like he mattered for the first time, but he savored every moment with Remus. Apparently his story caused quite a stir with the merpeople. They intended not to keep the peace but still take the sacrifice. A little fuck you courtesy of Remus.

"You're so gorgeous, my dear. Doing such a good job." Remus whispered, swimming alongside Virgil. "So perfect."

Virgil stopped swimming, treading in the water. He was bright red, sinking the lower half of his face in the water to hide. 

"Oh, dear, don't do that!" Remus had a shit-eating grin. He knew exactly what he was doing. "You're so beautiful when you're all flustered. Don't hide."

Virgil sank all the way under, holding his breath. It was very embarrassing and pleasing at the same time. Remus sank under as well, still smug.

"I can speak under water clearly. You're so lovely and pretty and perfect. I am in love with you. I will treasure you every day and remind you all day how wonderful you are. I will scream it even in the deepest of trenches and above the water so all may know."

Virgil would try to hide his face, but he needed air. He went back up, gasping as Remus followed hugged him. "You're such an asshole. Stop it. That's embarrassing!"

"I'm just telling it like it is. You deserve to be praised and worshiped, and if that's what turns you on then, well, that's a bonus."

"It doesn't turn me on! It just makes me feel happy!"

"So it emotionally turns you on. That is equally as much of a bonus. Makes you feel good."

"I want to call off the wedding. I'd rather you eat me. This is the worst thing that could ever happen. This is worse than when I puked in front of you, and I'm still embarrassed about that."

Remus' grin turned into the stare of someone on the hunt as he kissed Virgil with as much passion as he could. Virgil made a small noise but quickly submitted to the kiss. Remus lifted him up, grinning against his lips before pulling away and kissing his chin. "I don't know. You don't seem to hate it that much. I'd be glad to eat you in other ways."

"Oh my god!" Virgil covered his face. "Remus no!"

"On our wedding night? Can I compliment you on our wedding night until I sort of condition you to respond certain ways to praise? Because that would make me very happy. That would cause such distress and chaos but in the best of ways."

Virgil nodded weakly, letting out a sigh. "Yes. I'm terrified, but you may."

"If it ever gets to be too uncomfortable, you can say the words dead seal. It will instantly kill the mood, and I'll know it means you want to vomit."

"Okay, you do realize how mortifying it was to puke in front of you, right? Like, I'm not proud that was my first impression."

"If it helps, your first impression was you crying and writhing in pain because you dislocated your shoulder. Then it was you freaking out and panicking. I think it was actually your fifth impression that was you puking."

Virgil groaned, burying his face in Remus' neck. "That's even more embarrassing. God, how do you find me attractive?"

"I just do."

Virgil made another noise, this one of disagreement.

"My brother and his friends love you already. They want to murder your family. I can't wait until we can wage war on them. There will be nothing left to hurt you once you're given to us. I cannot wait."

"I feel the same."

* * *

Virgil didn't show up the next night. Nor did he the night after that, or the night after that. Remus would wait for hours, worried for his love. Finally, on the day of his birthday, he appeared followed by his parents and watched by the town. It was normal. All the merfolk were there as well. Virgil's eyes were glassy as he walked. Multiple bruises and wounds were all over his body. They weren't there a month ago. Some were probably from that morning. Remus swam closer to the drop point where Virgil would be jumping in. Virgil remained unresponsive, just staring forward. He looked broken. Obedient in the worst of ways.

"He's damaged." Remus' brother called out. Roman looked mad. This proved Remus' claims right. They mistreated Virgil. "You damaged him."

"If I may explain, we merely tried to fix him. He would be more resistant if we did anything less." Virgil's mother said, a sickening smile on her face. "He will accept his role with dignity like this."

"This is not how we make peace." Roman continued, glaring.

"He will still be the same as far as taste goes."

Virgil made eye contact with Remus, and it was as if he was looking straight through him. It was awful. So much recovery would have to be done. Remus waited under him, not sure if Virgil would remember how to swim. The minute Virgil was pushed in, Remus grabbed him and took him under the water. He held up a small shell. "My love, this is going to taste awful, and it'll hurt like hell, but I need you to eat it."

Virgil opened his mouth, following the order with fear in his eyes. He jerked when he opened his mouth, making Remus aware he didn't know where he was. He didn't realize he was underwater. Remus shoved the shell in his mouth before using his hands to make Virgil chew. Virgil, still withholding himself from making too much movement, winced as he chewed the shell. It felt like glass was cutting his mouth and throat as he swallowed it. He was faintly aware he was breathing now, not struggling to keep water out of his mouth, and his whole body felt warm. 

"Virgil, please speak to me. Please say something." Remus begged, kissing him quickly and abundantly. "Did they break you past the point of remembering me?"

Virgil shook his head, glancing up. "Can they hear us?"

"No. No, they can't."

"What did the shell do. I'm sorry if that was a dumb question." Virgil was being careful with his words, fearing the worst.

"Well, it changed your body up. For one, you can carry children, so that's exciting. You can also breathe in the water. You get to keep your legs, but swimming is easier now. Water will feel so natural, my love. You can see and hear in it easier than you could before. You'll live longer. Can't have you dying like humans do. You'll live as long as the mer do, and that's quite some time. I promise this isn't how we will be wed. We'll have a proper ceremony once we initiate war. What did they do to you?"

"They caught me sneaking in. Guards were waiting in my room. They threatened to rip out my tongue and cut off my limbs in advance, but they claimed it was part of the hunt. I was locked in the dungeon and tortured. I couldn't get out. They wouldn't help me. No one would help me. I was so scared. A little pissed off, but mostly fearing for my life."

Remus let out a small laugh. Relief? Anger? Sorrow? It was hard to tell where the laugh came from, but Remus held him close, whispering nothing but good things to Virgil as he watched from below what was taking place above. War. War for daring to mistreat their sacrifice. It was an insult to them. They didn't seem to respect the merfolk, so they would get what was owed to them. Virgil remained shaken, but he was calming down as the minutes passed. Remus just ran his fingers through Virgil's hair, continuing his praise. Finally, after what was probably ten minutes, Roman swam down.

"Oh, they're fucking terrified." Roman reported before peaking at Virgil. "Is he alright? Not dead?"

"Not dead. He ate the shell, and he'll have to be treated after the ceremony. Maybe before it. Yeah, before it. He needs a doctor. Virgil, this is your brother-in-law. Don't feel the need to be polite. He's an asshole sometimes."

Virgil nodded, still a bit out of it. 

"I've heard only good things about you. I'm quite jealous my brother received a partner sooner than myself, but I have much more important matters to attend to than love. How badly did they damage you?"

"So much trauma." Virgil whispered, looking up again. "I never want to see a cane again. They can't reach us down here, right? Right?"

"No, my love. You're safe, Come now, we'll get you healed and be married."

"Alright."

Remus winced. Even that felt like Virgil was forcing himself to agree.

* * *

"So lovely."

"Remus."

"Have I mentioned talented? You've gotten so great at hunting."

"Remus, please."

"You killed that whale with so much force, I was about to die from pride."

"Remus, we're with your friends. Stop."

Remus ignored his husband, continuing to dote upon him. They were visited by Roman and more merfolk that Virgil had gotten to know from his time there. Patton, Logan, and Janus. He was especially fond of Logan who would be one hundred percent real with him in any given situation, uncaring about feelings. Something looked bad and could be fixed immediately? Logan would say so. Made accessorizing so much easier. Virgil tried to ignore his husband, but he was unable to hide his laughter as Remus showered him in affection.

"I'm sorry. It was my first time successfully hunting." Virgil explained, pushing Remus' head away. 

"You did do a great job! I saw him do it!" Patton said, looking around excitedly. "He did a very good job!"

"We're all proud. You trained him well." Janus said, not very interested in the conversation. He liked Virgil just fine, but Remus was getting very affectionate, and Janus was not interested in seeing another make out session from this pair.

"I didn't train him! I taught him! He's not a pet! He's my lovely husband!" That made Remus stop, frowning at Janus and letting go of Virgil. "You don't train your husband. He just needed a push to be able to kill."

"How are you doing, though? I know some of our weapons we previously traded with humans caused distress." Logan ate something from the table, keeping his composure. 

Virgil stared off into space, the same forced, fearful smile plastered on his face as he remembered in vivid detail each weapon they used that reminded him of his abuse. He didn't answer for a bit, just staring at the wall across from him as he relived a lot of his life.

"Virgil?" Remus tapped him, making him jump.

"Huh? What? Sorry." Virgil snapped out of it. "What were we talking about?"

Patton slapped his hand over Logan's mouth, smiling. "Nothing! Just how excited we were that you killed a whale! Right Roman?"

"Right! Yes!" Roman laughed, glancing around. He was a shit liar. "So, anyway, the war is in our favor. The townspeople have joined our side against their rulers for causing such distress. All we have is the palace to destroy. There wasn't anything you wanted to keep, right Virgil?"

"Everything I had would be destroyed in the water. I don't believe I want any of those memories here. I made new ones. Also, if I really wanted anything from above, I could get there. I can still breathe air and walk. I'm just going to miss horror plays and novels. I could always acquire those." Virgil closed his eyes, trying to see if he still had any memorized. "Well, I have at least three memorized. I can entertain myself with those for about ten years. They don't get old."

"Wonderful. Alright. Thank you for inviting us to your hunt." Roman said before excusing himself, followed by the others quite quickly. Remus turned his attention to Virgil again.

"You left again. You were there, but you weren't there. So that's another topic we're adding the list to avoid. I don't like when you relive your trauma like that. I'm fine with saying disturbing things like telling you how we used to eat humans, but I don't like when you turn off."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize. We'll put it on the list. It's good that we know what your triggers are. I love you."

"I love you too."

* * *

Virgil liked walking on the beach. It was nice during the day, when the sun was out and the waves cooled his feet. It had been two hundred years. The palace had been destroyed so long ago, and the kingdom abandoned. An occasional wanderer would find Virgil on the beach and ask what he was doing here. He'd calmly explain he was just stretching his legs before continuing, and if they tried to make him continue, he'd go into the water. Remus would sometimes swim alongside him if he felt like it, and it was always a nice time for the two to talk gently and share their love. Sometimes they'd reenact their meeting, usually during their anniversary. Virgil sometimes explored further to the ruins of his home. Not much was there anymore. A couple baby portraits, and one novel. He left them there, not wanting Remus to show everyone a picture of baby Virgil as he was one to do.

Yes, Virgil rather cared for the beach.

**Author's Note:**

> Author fact: during the period I was writing this, I took a shower after gardening and went to scratch my nose. I used too much force, and fucking punched myself in the face. This was the first time since I was seven that I got a bloody nose, and I panicked.  
> Laugh at my shame. I rolled a 17 or something on strength but a 1 on dexterity and constitution. I didn't break my nose, so it wasn't a natural 20, but Jesus am I dumb. I ran out of the shower and went "WHAT DO I DO"


End file.
